Belconnen Cougars 2006 Team Thread

[Sasha]

The Bruce Bobcats are back, but this year they will be known as the Belconnen Cougars, after just avoiding relegation last season the team has appointed Royston Lightning as coach and nutrition co-ordinator.

Belconnen Cougars Current Top 25


Clinton Schifcofske
Phil Graham
Marshall Chalk
Jason Smith
Todd Carney
Josh Miller
Lincoln Withers
Andrew Lomu
Todd Learloyd Lahrs
Tim Smith
Eric Grothe
Dean Widders
Hazem El Masri
Matt Cooper
Michael Ennis
Cameron Smith
Craig Fitzgibbon
Billy Slater
Nick Younquest
Brian Carney
Preston Campbell
Ruben Wiki
Dean Halatau
Anthony Laffranchi
Dustin Hoffman

News on a major sponsor are expected soon.

[IBG]

Dustin Hoffman

It's Ryan Hoffman you goose!

Unless you want the actor who dresses up in drag as Tootsie...

[Nick]

must say, Dustin Hoffman aside who's a fine actor (not)
that is one **** house looking line up

they will struggle to make the top 11

[Sasha]

ooops

Anyway I shall leave it like that for comedic purposes

[Sasha]

Belconnen Cougars are pleased to announce their 2006 major sponsor



The teams official name will now be the Cougar Bourbon Belconnen Cougars

[Sasha]

COUGAR BOURBON BELCONNEN COUGARS NAME SIDE FOR ROUND 1

The Cougar Bourbon Belconnen Cougars have announced their Round 1 team with Coach Royston Lightning stacking the side with scoring potential. The Cougars are also pleased to announce that season ticket sales are up 17% on last year and that ACTEWAGL Park will be ready for round 1 after construction work followin the blowing up of the ground by the now defunct Batye Street Bruisers was finished ahead of Schedule

Cougar Bourban Belconnen Cougars
1. Clinton Schifcofske
2. Hazem El Masri
3. Matt Cooper
4. Matt King (c)
5. Phil Graham
6. Preston Campbell
7. Tim Smith
8. Michael Ennis
9. Lincoln Withers
10. Cameron Smith
11. Dean Widders
12. Casey Mcguire
13. Tom Learloyd Lahrs

14. Billy Slater
15. Eric Grothe
16. Timana Tahu
17. Jason Smith
18. Todd Carney
19. Brian Carney

[Nick]

Newly appointed Avengers CEO Chopper Read hit back at Cougars coach Royston Lightning in a breif statement

"**** Royston Lightning? Who the **** is that nevelle... couldnt hit the fluff off a **** capachino, like another Neville i know, Neville **** Bardos... that girls still cryin, "ohh chopper shot me, give me welfare", no doubt if me and Royston had words we'd have two whinging **** Nevelles running around, the only thing i regret is not having killed the pair of them when i was in the under world"

[Sasha]

Cougars announce coaching staff

The Cougar Bourbon Belconnen Cougars have announced 2 more of their new coaching staff, technical directors Stewie and Brian Griffin.


Stewie and Brian going over some more technical aspects of Royston Lightnings coaching structure

[Sasha]

Royston Lightning issues reply to C-Grade Coach

"Chopper? who the hell is that prick, had to committ a crime to become famous, this muppet has never played the game at the highest level, this clown should be coaching U8's touch, this bloke doesn't scare at me at all, I just hope for his sake that he shows up to every game so he doesn't violate his parole- useless pelican"

[Raider Azz]

**** amateur coaches.

The only thing Royston Lightning and Chopper Read will be fighting over this year is the wooden spoon.

[Sasha]

Cougars name round 3 side.

The winless cougars have named their side to play the norfolk enchants. Team Moral is at an all time low, 18 empty casks of D Grade wine were found out the back of Cougar HQ. No one has come forward yet, but Craig Gower has been stood down for a totally unrelated reason, Preston Campbell also has been granted a weeks leave "cos he feels like it". Back up halves Jason Smith and Todd Carney come into the staring line up.

BELCONNEN COUGARS

1. Billy Slater
2. Hazem El Masri (c) (gk)
3. Phil Graham
4. Matt King
5. Matt Cooper
6. Jason Smith
7. Todd Carney
8. Michael Ennis
9. Lincoln Withers
10. Cam Smith
11. Casey Mcguire
12. Dean Widders
13. Travis Norton

14. Clinton Schifcofske
15. Brian Carney
16. Matt Geyer
17. Dean Young

[jedski]

Cougars name round 3 side.

The winless cougars have named their side to play the norfolk enchants. Team Moral is at an all time low, 18 empty casks of D Grade wine were found out the back of Cougar HQ. No one has come forward yet, but Craig Gower has been stood down for a totally unrelated reason, Preston Campbell also has been granted a weeks leave "cos he feels like it". Back up halves Jason Smith and Todd Carney come into the staring line up.

BELCONNEN COUGARS

1. Billy Slater
2. Hazem El Masri (c) (gk)
3. Phil Graham
4. Matt King
5. Matt Cooper
6. Jason Smith
7. Todd Carney
8. Michael Ennis
9. Lincoln Withers
10. Cam Smith
11. Casey Mcguire
12. Dean Widders
13. Travis Norton

14. Clinton Schifcofske
15. Brian Carney
16. Matt Geyer
17. Dean Young

Norfolk Enchants team list accidentally leaked to the press.

1. Matt Bowen
2. Hazem El Masri (gk)
3. Matt Sing
4. Phil Graham
5. Mark Gasnier (c)
6. Darren Lockyer
7. Brent Sherwin
8. Craig Wing
9. Michael Monaghan
10. Ruben Wiki
11. Nathan Hindmarsh
12. Anthony Laffranchi
13. Benny Galea

14. Clinton Schifkofske
15. Anthony Minichiello
16. Tim Smith
17. Lincoln Withers

[Sasha]

After slumping to their 5th consecutive lost, officials have told CEO Schifty that if the tea can not win 1 of its next 2 matches the franchise may be sold off..